


The Hardest Part

by orphan_account, shadowed_sunsets



Series: Moment's 'verse [2]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, Fluff, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-05-06
Updated: 2010-05-06
Packaged: 2017-10-09 08:30:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/85119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account, https://archiveofourown.org/users/shadowed_sunsets/pseuds/shadowed_sunsets
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which the Doc and Rose finally get their heads knocked together, while Donna is left behind waiting impatiently. Story number 2 in a series.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Hardest Part

The Doctor and Rose walked out of the TARDIS to find themselves standing on a hillside in an area that seemed to be just outside of town, with the lights of houses twinkling down below them. Turning, the Doctor saw that Donna was already preoccupied with talking to an grey-haired man who looked familiar, but he wasn't sure why.

About to walk over and introduce himself, he was stopped when Rose took his hand again and turned back towards her with an inquiring look.

"How've you been?" She asked softly, a touch of worry in her expression. The Doctor shrugged and said with a laugh,

"Same old life. Still wandering. Running. Getting into trouble." Rose laughed,

"Not much has changed then, has it?" He shook his head and asked, hesitantly,

"And your mum? And... Pete?" Rose shrugged her shoulders.

"They're doing fine. Pete's looking after her and mum's enjoying being able to do more things now."

"I don't suppose, that.... there's been anyone else, has there? Anyone who you've.... been seeing?" The Doctor asked, trying not to let the hope sound through in his tone. He looked away from her, not wanting to see her reaction. Rose's eyes darkened.

"What do you mean 'has there been anyone else?' Course there hasn't! Don't you remember what I told you?" He looked uncomfortable now, releasing her hands.

"Well, of course I do," He reassured her, glancing at her for a few seconds before looking away again. "But, it's probably been a few years for you. And I thought, that.... you might have moved on. Built a new life for yourself."

Rose glared at him, hands opening and closing at her sides. "Built a new life for myself? Just like that? After all we've seen and done Doctor? Yeah right." Her voice rose with every word until she was shouting at him, tears leaking from her eyes without her being aware of it. "You were my life Doctor. And I waited for you, for 2 years, I waited for you Doctor. But in the end, I was the one who had to come find you. I'm the one who came back to you."

She raised a hand to point a finger directly in his face as he leaned backward, eyes wide with astonishment.

"So don't you dare say that I moved on. Cause I couldn't, not without you."

"So er… there's no one, then?" The Doctor asked, not quite sure what her original answer had been.

"Bastard!" Rose shrieked, sounding much like her mother. She slapped just as hard as her mother, as the Doctor found out. And despite her ire with him, despite the fact that he was going to have to grovel a bit to get back into her good books (and didn't he feel domesticated right now?), he couldn't help but grin like a loon. Rose was back. And from what she had said, she wasn't leaving him again, if she could help it.

Donna marched over to him a few seconds after Rose had stormed off and grabbed his wrist, dragging him towards the TARDIS.

"C'mon, space man, time to go appease your girlfriend." The Doctor snapped out of his daze, sputtering.

"She's not…"

"Save it!" Donna told him sharply as she shut the door carefully behind them. And when they turned around, Rose was nowhere to be found.

As if this didn't matter, the Doctor bounded up to the console, his energy regained. He proceeded to tap a few buttons; not paying any attention to the amused Donna perched on the jump seat.

"Rose is in her room, the horse is in its stall—"

"You have a horse on this ship?" Donna asked incredulously, but the Doctor ignored her.

"—And all we need is a destination," He finished brightly. Donna crossed her arms resolutely, and looked at him until suddenly he jumped, breaking the silence building between them.

"Ouch!" It seemed the TARDIS had shocked him where he held onto her, expressing her own disapproval. "Are all the women in my life out to get me? I'm a 900 year old Time Lord, I don't need—argh!" Again, the TARDIS had shocked him, letting him know she still disagreed. The Doctor glared at the two of them and grumbled angrily.

"Fine. Don't touch anything, Donna, I mean it," He warned, and with that, stomped out of the console room.

As he vanished into the hallway, Donna stood up, and patted the console affectionately.

"I don't know if you're really alive or not, but… thanks?" She frowned, "Look at me, he must be rubbing off. I'm talking to a machine!" Shaking her head, Donna settled down on the jump seat again to wait.

*~*~*~*  
The Doctor arrived in front of Rose's door several minutes after having practically stormed out of the console room, feeling calmer than he had been before but still not quite ready for this. If he was being honest with himself, which wasn't often thank goodness, he wasn't the confrontational sort. A lesson that he had been harshly reminded of by Jack's reappearance in his life and by the events that followed. Of course the Doctor had known that with Rose's return this confrontation would come up sooner or later, but he had been hoping for the option of later. It seemed though that the women in his life, plus one more now, were all conspiring against him. Or it was his annoying ability to say the wrong thing at most definitely the wrong time that had gotten him into this mess.

He wasn't sure if the longer time than usual to get to Rose's room was part of the TARDIS playing with him as she was apt to do (especially when annoyed with him) or because she had been giving Rose time before what he had a feeling might be a slightly explosive confrontation.

Taking a deep breath, the Doctor raised his hand to knock on the apparent wood of the door, and then when there was no answer he leaned in and called softly, "Rose? It's me, can I come in?"

There was a noise that he was fairly sure was a sniffle followed by a rustle until finally Rose replied, her voice wavering slightly, "Yeah, sure."

Even though he had her permission, the Time Lord still found himself feeling hesitant as he lowered his hand to the handle of the door and pushed it down before slowly allowing it to creak open.

He found Rose in the middle of the room sitting stretched out on the pink carpet at the foot of her bed, leaning against the wooden footboard. Around her were scattered many of the mementos from their various trips she had brought back with her, but what caught his eye was the photo album lying open in her lap.

The Doctor walked cautiously into the room over to settle down next to her, staying as close as he dared, and peered over her shoulder at the pictures she was looking at.

Many of them were ones he had seen before, taken either by Jackie during their visits back to Earth or on planets when they had managed to find someone who could and would take their picture. In almost all of them the two of them were together and smiling or laughing, just like they always did, but as he sat there the Doctor realized that for the few minutes since he had come in Rose hadn't turned the page or even barely moved.

Curious, he leaned in closer to her to see what she seemed so transfixed by and found his breath momentarily stolen from him as he realized what picture she couldn't tear her eyes away from.

It was from their first Christmas together when he had regenerated into this body and during the Christmas feast he had joined her small family for.

He and Rose were sitting next to each other at the table, facing the camera, with those silly paper crown things stuffed onto their heads- his green, hers pink- and laughing like they were having the time of their lives. But what struck him the most was that neither of them were looking at the camera or even at anyone else in the room; instead, they were staring at each other, with the silliest looks on their faces.

The Doctor sighed, wishing he could return to those carefree days, and said softly, "Rose…"

She startled slightly at the sound of his voice, as if her mind had wandered away and she'd forgotten he was in the room with her. "Yeah," Rose said softly, closing the album on her lap. "So, you kept my room then?"

"Yep," He replied simply, putting much more cheerfulness into the word than he was feeling at the moment. He didn't go on to tell her how even after they left, he often kept the rooms of his companions somewhere on the TARDIS. Or how sometimes when he was feeling particularly reflective, he went in to simply sit on the bed and bury himself in the past for a while.

After Canary Wharf he had gone into her room only once to organize things a little and put a few things away before he left for the final time, locking the door behind him. He'd then placed a hand on the surface, asking the TARDIS to send the room away where he wouldn't have to see it and the memories it held every day.

That was the last time he had been in this room, or even near it. Of course he had always hoped he'd find a way back to her no matter how impossible it truly was, but now that they were finally together again maybe it was finally time.

"Looks just like I left it," Rose commented with a hint of surprise in her voice, lifting her head to turn and look at him. It didn't escape his notice that her brown eyes were shining slightly, as if she had been close to crying before he had came in. "You didn't change a thing."

He shook his head, "Not really, no. I just, couldn't." The Doctor sighed, turning away, "Haven't been back here since then either," He admitted quietly.

She stiffened against him, fingers tightening slightly on the spine of the album. "So you didn't want to come in here? Didn't want to think about all we did together? All those memories?" Rose asked harshly, the tones of her voice enough of a warning for him to be careful about his answer.

"I," The Doctor began then stopped himself, stalling as he tried to find a way to appease her without saying too much. It was odd to him that he was having such a hard time figuring out what to say since this body seemed to have no trouble with words, and most definitely had a gob. He was usually so good with words, especially when using them to solve puzzles or talk down people who were trying to destroy things or hurt other people. But here now, with Rose, the right words- or any words- seemed to have escaped him completely.

"It's not that I didn't want to Rose, it was that- I just, I couldn't." He sighed, obviously flustered, and raised a hand to ruffle his hair, "It was too much, and I, I missed… It wasn't-"

"So you didn't come in here, you locked away my room just cause you couldn't stand it?" Rose asked, voice rising as she turned to glare at him even though he hadn't met her eyes for a few minutes now. "Doctor, I can understand that after Canary Wharf you didn't want to think about what happened, and that you wanted to move on. But, when you say you haven't come in here at all it makes me think just a bit that you wanted to forget, that you didn't want to think about me."

The Doctor spun around to face her again, feeling his anger with Rose rising as she appeared to take his meaning in the exact opposite way he had meant it. She really thought that he would have forgotten about her? That he had "moved on" after they lost each other at Canary Wharf, and hadn't thought about her at all? He might have taken on new companions since then, but that didn't mean at all that she hadn't left his mind or his thoughts once. She was Rose.

"Rose, how could you think that of me? We spent two years traveling together, seeing things that most people on Earth could never dream of seeing. All with life and death situations, lots of running and getting thrown in jail and escaping from them. You think I could forget all that, could forget… you?" He asked angrily, gesturing wildly as he tried to convince her of his honesty. But at his final question his voice became so quiet and distraught that she almost couldn't hear him at all, and had to lean in towards him as his eyes flickered downwards.

Rose sighed, "Course not Doctor. I didn't mean that, not really… But, why'd you never come in here then?" She paused, hesitating since she didn't really want to pile the guilt on him anymore. But, she had to know. "Why didn't you come in when you always did before, when we were traveling together? Why didn't you?"

The Doctor suddenly sprung to his feet and strode quickly across the room, not even glancing at her as he crossed the room to stop near the door.

"It's because I missed you!" He shouted, whirling around on his heel to face her again. "It's because I didn't want to come in here and see all of the things you left behind! All the things that reminded me of you, and that I might never get you back!"

For a few seconds Rose stared at him, troubled by how upset he sounded. Part of her had of course expected him to be upset, this was their first time seeing each other in years, but she had long ago gotten used to how he rarely talked about anything emotional. It was just too bad that their final reunion had somehow deteriorated into a match of them questioning each other, and arguing. But, now that things seemed to be finally out in the open…

"So what, you couldn't forget me but you didn't want to be reminded of me? You didn't want to think about me if you didn't have to? Is that it Doctor?" Rose demanded, rising to her feet as well, the photo album sliding from her lap and down onto the floor.

The Doctor wildly shook his head, "No. No, no, no, no! Course not! That's not what I meant Rose." His head became still again, but he still looked as sad and troubled. "I thought about you so often that even I lost count of how many times. I thought about you so often that I could barely think of anything else, except for getting back to you. I tried to move on, I did, I really did. But I couldn't, I just… couldn't. And I still wasn't able to come in here. This was your sanctuary in the TARDIS, this room yours. And I didn't dare trespass, because this was all I had left of you."

Her anger and pain began to fade at his reassurances, as from his words it dawned upon her that he had felt the same way as she had during their time apart. She had always hoped that he might, but it helped her heart to know that her hopes had been true. That he had missed her as much as she had missed him.

Rose took a step towards him, as she said softly, "You're always welcome in here Doctor, if I'm here or not. This is your TARDIS after all," she said with a small smile.

But he shook his head once more, protesting, "She might be my ship Rose, but this is your room. I'll enter only with your permission, but I'm glad you've now given it to me. Perhaps I'll come more often after this."

The smile Rose had been giving him grew until she felt it within her heart, and could barely stop it herself. "What, you're not going to rush in anymore? Bursting in without even knocking first?" She teased him with the hope that it would lighten the tension between them instead of weighing it, then after a pause took another step forward.

For a few long, stressed seconds he merely stared at her, and Rose found herself unable to tell what he was thinking, and so fell into worry.

But then finally a smile grew on his face and the light in his eyes returned in full force. And to her relief he laughed.

"I'll try my best Rose, but I might forget myself sometimes," the smile flickered for a few seconds, but then he seemed to gather his strength again enough to continue. "You'll simply have to be patient with me."

Rose smiled at him again, and said lightly, soothingly, "I think I could do that, somehow. But it'd be nice if you at least tried to cooperate."

He laughed again, making Rose's heart soar, "Like I said Rose, I'll do my best."

In the silence after that in which they simply grinned at each other, Rose slowly walked up to him and then stopped barely a foot away. She then silently held out her hand to him invitingly, and waited nearly breathlessly as he stared at it curiously before slowly raising his own hand in turn and laid it on top of hers before entwining their fingers together.

Then, without another word to each other yet hand in hand, the Doctor and Rose walked together out of her room, and down the hallway.  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

It had been an hour now, and Donna was still sitting in the console room, having finished the novel that had appeared by her feet. Drumming her nails on the jump seat cushion, she finally decided to go looking for them. They had had enough alone time, in her opinion. Time to make sure Rose hadn't either murdered or gagged the Doctor.

She knew that the TARDIS was rather large for a machine that appeared to be the size of a police box. But even she couldn't have anticipated its true size.

After wandering through three bedrooms, a garden, a swimming pool (which she made note of later), the Wardrobe room, one room with only white walls and nothing else, a very messy room with what looked like a mile long scarf that she was sure nobody could possibly wear without tripping, a closet, and then to her own room, she concluded that she was lost.

In fact, not only was she lost, but she was hungry, grumpy, and entirely frustrated with life in general. She was on board a semi-sentient, bigger on the inside spaceship, and she couldn't find the captain or his… whatever Rose was to the Doctor.

And she couldn't find the kitchen.

She pinched the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger, staving off the oncoming headache.

And when she looked up, a door appeared.

"Bloody hell," she muttered. This ship was incredibly weird.

She opened up the door cautiously, and then smiled.

The Doctor and Rose were sitting at the kitchen table, each with a cup of tea in their hands, laughing at something The Doctor had said.

She rolled her eyes, and went into the kitchen with them to go make herself a sandwich. She was starving.


End file.
